What does God want from me?

For the last couple weeks I have been thinking about what God wants from me. In one of my moms groups we have been working on making mission statements for the roles that we have in our lives. This has really got me to thinking about what God wants from me in each role that I fill. The first thing we were supposed to do was make a list of all the roles that we fill and then prioritize in order of importance. My first thought is that my children come first then everything else because they are the ones that I spend the most time with. As I started to dig into the Bible more to find verses to put into my mission statement I realized that my priorities were not in line to what God wants. My first priority is supposed to be God. When I thought about that I realized just where I had placed God... on my to do list. I was reminded again today that I need to be spending more time in His word and in conversation with Him. When I am closer to my God then and only then can I be the wife and mother that I am meant to be.
I have been reading Paul's letters to the Corinthians and I feel as though I can relate to Paul in one of the ways he speaks of. He says that he is more bold in his letters and shy when speaking in public. It was easier for him to send a letter to the people he loved than to speak to them face to face. I feel the same way. There are so many times when I have things that I want to say but I am too afraid to speak them out loud. After I read that Paul had the same affliction (I don't know if he was afraid but I am) I asked if there was some way for me to speak what He has placed on my heart without actually having to speak in front of people. As I was sitting there thinking, this blog popped into my head. Yes, I could use this blog to write down what God has been doing in  my life and what He has been teaching me. So what better way to start than by sharing with you all where I have come from.

I was born and raised in a Christian home. I have wonderful parents who taught me to love the Lord from when I was a young girl. As a child I was a people pleaser and I tried to do whatever it took to stay out of trouble. I did have my moments of disobedience and I know that I had my fair share of consequences (my sister may say other wise). I went to a Christian school all the way through to grade 12 and I do not regret that at all. When I was in high school I had the honor of praying with a very close friend of mine as he gave his life to Christ. At the time I did not understand fully the huge step he was taking I just knew that if he wanted to be in Heaven one day then that is what he needed to do. I was so excited for him and I will always remember that day. I felt as though my walk with God was so strong and that in everything I did I lived my life for him.
I graduated from high school and moved to Brandon to attend Brandon University. I was taking courses to become a teacher. As I met people and made new friends I realized that I had lived a privileged life. I did not know a lot of what was going on in the secular circles and a part of me felt as though I was better than others because of how I grew up. As the years went on God worked in me and gave me a desire to help others instead of judge them from my holier than thou platform but I had no idea of how to help them if I had not experienced what they had been through. I am sure you know how it feels to be told how to fix your problems by someone who has never been in your situation or who has no idea what they are actually talking about. That was me. I wanted to give advice and to help people but what could I actually say that would be of any encouragement at all. So one day I asked God to let me be more experienced with the world so that I would know how to help others. I had no idea what I was asking for and I was not ready for the answer. God began to allow me to go down paths that I would not have taken and allowed circumstances to come up in my life so that I would learn what it was He wanted me to learn.
At the age of 20 I started dating a guy. This was my first boyfriend ever and I was in love with the idea of having a boyfriend. We met at a funeral for a friend that I grew up with who was killed in a car accident. I was moved by how emotional this guy was and a part of me wanted to help him and make him feel happy again. As we started dating I knew that this was not really the kind of guy God wanted for me but he loved me. He spent every last minute trying to make me feel like the most treasured girl in the world. The only problem was that I was not attracted to him I was attracted to the idea of having a boyfriend. He was a nice guy (very redneck, sometimes to the point of being extremely ridiculous). I liked the attention. We dated for 4 months in which we got ourselves into situations that were not in any way God honoring. I broke up with him the day after Christmas (I know... what a nice person. Wait for the gifts to be shared and then take the loot and run). When I went back to University after the Christmas break my friends all told me that they knew he was not right for me. I was frustrated that no one had bothered to share their thoughts with me but thinking back now I know that I would not have listened anyway.
Life went back to normal after that. I got back into school work and finished up the year. I went home for the summer and worked. The next year I came back and life resumed. God allowed one situation after another to come into my life each with a teaching point attached to it, all I had to do was look for it. I remember sitting with my best friend at the time talking about the problems in our lives and being able to encourage each other. Helping each other through our different issues. One time we were sitting in her car talking, we had been there for a while deep in conversation when there was a knock at the window. A nice police officer just wanted to make sure we were OK and then told us to take our conversation somewhere else. God was really shaping my life in ways I would appreciate later on.
It was the fall of 2005 when I met Mike. We met at a basketball game (he was friends with my roommate and asked her if she would want to come so he would not have to go alone. She did not want to be there alone with him so she asked me to go too). I thought he liked her so I kept giving him types on how to ask her out and what kind of gifts he should buy her. Then on Nov.2, 2005 he asked me if I would want to go out on a date. He was a pretty funny guy so I thought "why not". Our first date was Nov. 4, 2005. He took me to Kirkaldyheights school and we sat on the play structure in sleeping bags eating tim bits, drinking hot chocolate and reading kids stories (because he knew I wanted to be a teacher and thought I would like this). It was a great date and even though he was harassed for it later by his friends I loved it. I knew that this was a guy I wanted to get to know better. We dated for two years during which God, again, brought situations into my life that caused me some momentary pain and heartache. I know now that they were teaching opportunities that I had asked for but at the time I just did not understand.
In Nov. 2006 Mike asked me to come on a trip with him and his family to New Zealand!!! I said yes, absolutely. On January 13, 2007 Mike proposed to me beside a man made river with lit up fountains in it. It was a random spot (not searched out before hand) and it was beautiful. I said yes and I am so glad that I did. 6 years and 2 children later I could not love this man anymore than I do today.
Over the next little while I will be sharing some specific instances in my life where God has helped me and taught me lessons I never thought I would need to learn but am so thankful that I have learned them.
Psalm 73:25-26

Wordless Wednesday

Fun, Family and long weekends

This last weekend we went to Winnipeg from Friday to Sunday. On Friday we picked up a new car. Mike bought a Ford Fusion Hybrid online and had it shipped to Winnipeg where we picked it up. It is a lot of fun to drive and the car is bigger and better than our last car ( there is a bigger back seat and the car has more options). We spent time at Ikea, went to Costco, shopped at Polo Park Mall and swam a lot in the pool at the hotel. We were blessed to have friends come and spend time with us at the hotel and then go for supper. I always feel a little funny when we spend time with our friends who also have children. I feel like we are all playing house, and then one of the children starts to cry and throw a fit and then I know that this is our reality. A reality that I love. I have two amazing and beautiful daughters that I love beyond words and a husband whom I love more today than I did the day we were married. On Sunday we watched Mike's sister Rebecca graduate with her Bachelor of Social Work. She worked so hard and was awarded with the Chancellors medal which means that she had the highest gpa of her entire class. Hannah was so happy for her auntie that while she was up getting her degree, the entire sanctuary was quiet, Hannah yelled "yay auntie Rebecca, yay auntie Rebecca". We were very proud of Rebecca and know that there are big things waiting for her out there.

After the grad we drove to Austin to celebrate my dads birthday with the rest of my family. All in all it was a great weekend. It was great to have a mini holiday but great to come home, sleep in our own beds and start getting back into routine.

We have been blessed with a daughter who has an incredible vocabulary and a very active imagination. I love how she makes up stories and scenarios of things going on beyond my site and how she comes up with things that are just so funny. Yesterday she was getting ready to go to a friends house for a play date. I told her to get some socks on so she went to her room and then returned to my room holding 1 sock. She says "mom, where is the other sock?" she looks down at her feet and says "I have 2 feet". She loves her baby sister and asks to play with her everyday. There is always a part of the day when Hannah wants Zoey to join her at a picnic or a party with the Stuffed animals in our house. When Hannah comes close to Zoey there are always big smiles so I know the love is reciprocated.

Tomorrow we go to get Zoey's two month needles and doctor checkup done. I am so nervous about this. As a second time mom I know what is coming and I don't want my baby to feel pain. On the other hand I want her to be protected from getting the full force of all the diseases that could attack her little body. I am praying that she will take it well and not have any adverse reaction to the immunizations.

Today is April 30th and it is snowing outside. The girls and I went to our moms group this morning at our church and when we got home Hannah said "I sure wish it was a nice spring day. I wish the snow would all be gone". I second that. I am thankful for the warmer weather that we have had and I am now looking forward to the nice weather I am sure is coming.

Our moms group at Church is working on making mission statements for our role in our family as well as for our homes. This is a topic that I have not thought that much about. I know that the role that I play here on earth is very important but to try to make a mission statement for it is a tough job. I have not gotten very far but I just know that this will be very helpful to set a standard in our home. I know that as the wife/mother/homemaker I set the tone in our home and up until this point I have not been doing a great job at it. There are a lot of dreams I have for my family and for my home so I think I need to really put effort into this so that God can start bringing about a change in our home/family. I am excited to see how this will turn out.

I don't have any of the pictures saved to my computer yet but when I do I will upload some to the blog.

Quick update

So this morning Hannah wanted to put a sticker up on her chore chart so I asked her what she would need to do and she said " make my bed" I replied "then go make your bed" she ran to her room and immediately she starts to cry and says "mom I can't do it I am just a little girl".
While I was cleaning up after supper Hannah says "mom, I am going to go downstairs to watch baseball." Me "ok" Hannah "I won't be here to keep Zoey company then" me "that's ok, I will be here" Hannah "ok". Always the caring big sister.
We got the stroller out this afternoon and went for a nice walk. It was wonderful to get out of the house as a family and enjoy the nice weather.

What a day!

Today at lunch Hannah and I were exchanging I love you's when she said "I love you so much. You are the best mom in the whole world!" I don't think I have to explain just how that made me feel. She is such a precious child and I love her to pieces.

I was noticing that the only child I have been talking about so far has been Hannah so I will give you a little update on Zoey as well. For the last three nights Zoey has slept 7, 9 & 7 hours. I am feeling well rested and I am enjoying my children more because of it. What a blessing they are to Mike and myself.

Now for a funny Hannah story. For all those parents out there who wonder if your children even realize what you are doing, THEY DO!!!! today we found Hannah sitting at the top of the stairs holding her doll with face towards her bare stomach saying "yummy yummy. That's good, I know." I don't actually recall saying those exact words to Zoey but Hannah just improvised. Apparently she did the same thing at Grandma P's yesterday as well. She has asked me before to let her feed Zoey from her tummy. I have tried to explain that that is just not possible so I am glad she has shifted her attention from Zoey to her doll.

We have some friends bringing supper over tonight. I am pretty excited to not have to cook tonight. I am also looking forward to spending an evening with friends. Spending time with your children all day is great but it sure is nice to break up the week with a visit with good friends.

Today's Hannahism

After supper today I was doing the dishes with my little helper right beside me. She was playing quietly with the basting brush when out of the blue she says "there is a storm coming, there is a storm coming. Run mom run." Then she leans over to hug me and says "I saved you. I saved the day. That was a close one." After that she kept running around pretending that storms were getting her and her babies. No one was safe from the storms this evening. When the storms were over we had a plague of lobsters coming to eat our feet. The adventures at our house tonight did not stop until her head hit the pillow. I love love love her imagination and I get excited to see what she will come up with next.

Today Zoey and I went out to Austin to have breakfast with my mom and sister. We had a good morning/afternoon and I was able to pick up my meat from the pig we had butchered on Saturday. All in all it was a very relaxing visit and very fun to come home to a house full of storms and lobsters. Never a dull moment for us!!!

A new leaf!

Well, this is certainly not a new thing for me to say but it sure has been a long time since I have posted anything here. I have decided to spend less time on Facebook so I think I am going to use my blog to post things that may have originally gone on my Facebook status. So my goal is to post a little something everyday. Whether it be about family or work or what God has been teaching me I hope to keep this up and maybe encourage others through my experiences.

Just to recap about me... I am a stay at home mom of two beautiful girls. My daughters are Hannah (2) and Zoey (6 weeks and 3 days). I am married to my wonderful husband Mike and we live in a bi-level house with a big back yard. I have my own garden in the backyard and I am super excited to get out there and start planting. I love playing with my kids and gardening. I have not really enjoyed cooking/baking since Hannah was born, it was more of a chore. Now that Zoey is here I would like to get back into it but not just start cooking again, I want to cook meals for my family that count. What I mean by "meals that count" is that I want to make a main course, salad or vegetable and dessert. This is brand new for me as I have never cooked meals for my family that contain all the food groups that they should be eating. I want to cook so my family is healthy and that they enjoy meal times. So this a new adventure. If you have any good meals that your family loves please feel free to send them my way.

Hannah has what we like to call Hannahisms. She has had a very large vocabulary from when she was very young and she says some of the funniest things. A while back I was lying in bed reading my devotions on my ipad when Hannah (who was lying in our bed with us) leaned over and flipped my screen up. I looked at her and said "Excuse me, I was reading that." Hannah says "looks like you have some stiff competition." Another time she asked if she could watch a movie I said yes but when we went downstairs I could not find the movie she wanted to watch. I went to check in the dvd player and Hannah leans over my shoulder to watch. When she spots the dvd she says "it was already in the dvd player, how convenient." On Saturday we had to take Hannah to the ER because she had fallen and hurt her arm. While we were in the room waiting for the doctor to come she says to Mike "My arm hurts just remember that. That is why I am sad. Just remember that." Then when Mike went to the bathroom Hannah started having a fit on the floor because she wanted to go to the bathroom too. She said "I have to pee, I have to pee, I have to pee... just kidding" She comes up with some of the funniest things. One day she came out of our room with Mike's belt draped on her shoulders and  said "look mom, I'm Pastor Dan." Or another time we were eating lunch and she did not really want to eat what was on her plate so she looked up at the ceiling and said "God, do you see what is going on down here? I don't want to eat my lunch." It is so hard not to burst out laughing especially when she is being disobedient or talking back with her words but she is just so funny. She has an amazing personality and she is my encouragement. The other morning I was sitting in the rocking chair in my housecoat with my hair all crazy from sleep and Hannah came to me and said "I love your housecoat, I love your hair. I just love everything." She is so encouraging which picks me up on days when I am not feeling pretty.

I will try to keep you updated on all the funny things she says and does but there are just so many that I am sure you would get bored from reading all of them.